I'm completely lost in a fucked up miserable complicating world of mine.
Its always the scenario where my friends are troubled and all and i would be the someone they could fall on. I have like 28 shoulders for friends to cry on at different period of times.
Who do i have?
Not even a caring boyfriend. This kills hard deep inside.
Knowing that my boyfriend isn't the first person i can run to whenever I'm feeling down.
*cries*
I feel like stabbing myself with a blunt pencil continuously till i hear my veins crying for me to stop. How careless am i? How on earth did i leave my identification card and ezlink in the bus without knowing it? I was so pissed with myself i almost ripped myself apart.
Everything will be perfect the day i die.
I'm not being like some fucken emo scumbag but right now I'm so disappointed in myself.
Who cares? Fuck it.
I don't know what to say or type. Where to go or what to do.
I just wanna curl up and cry.
Till someone runs along and pick me up and brings me back to reality.
What hurts and kills more is knowing that that person wouldn't even be my boyfriend.
8 hours and counting. *rips heart out and feeds it to the pigeons*
